Early Friday morning, Dan left for Jackson, Mississippi on the youth group mission trip! It was one of those nightmare situations when he had his alarm set, but it never went off at 2:00am. Thankfully he woke up at 2:52 (8 minutes before he wanted to leave), and needless to say, flew out the door. I of course thought he set his alarm wrong, but no siree, it was correct!
It was an incredibly stormy night, so I became a bit more paranoid after he left as the wind picked up, seeing leaves blow across the street. Needless to say, Mazy and I sure woke up to a mess of leaves in our pool! Such a mess that after 5 hours of trying to clean it out and trying to get the filter to work, I gave up (which is very unlike Kristin). And it felt GREAT to just walk away and leave a message with the pros. When Dan leaves, something always happens it seems, whether it be the air conditioner, water heater, pool, or even Mazy struggling with her daddy being gone (she pulled her hair out last year while Dan was in Haiti for 16 days). But it’s during these weeks, Mazy and I build such a special relationship.
Do you ever feel like your life looks like the picture above? Now I know, this is NOTHING compared to what your house may look like and trust me, it looked much worse earlier today. I just didn’t snap a picture at that time. Play-doh is in the carpet, a chair tossed, Mazy’s quiet book spread thin over the floor, and yet I think this is a perfect description of our lives, isn’t it? Some days are just a mess and some days are maybe a bit more put together.
You see, I was busy painting a door and Mazy was just as content as could be, playing in her little toy room. I could see her pretending, making snakes, doing puzzles, coloring with pens (oops), and just LOVING being a 2 year old. I didn’t want to stop it. I didn’t want to stop her imagination. I didn’t want her to stop being a toddler. It would have been so easy for me to say no, stop, etc. Part of me didn’t want to deal with the Play-doh mess later, but I realized it just didn’t really matter. Sometimes our lives are chaotic. Sometimes we don’t know which end is up. But we have to allow ourselves to live. We have to allow the messes in life because they are what make us who we are. Mazy is who she is because of moments like this today. Daddy is gone, things may be awry at times, and things may break, but you know what? Life goes on. There are bigger worries in life and I am not going to make Play-doh in the carpet one of them.
With Dan being gone, it honestly always gives me a bit of perspective. We are in no such routine yet since moving, which I do look forward getting into because it’s in my blood, but one thing I do appreciate about it being just us two, is moments like the picture above. I seem to be a bit more lax, I seem to sit back and watch her more than normal, and it just makes me love her all the more. Why I don’t do that normally I don’t know, but I am so thankful for the gift God has given us through Mazy, who continues to teach me so many life lessons!
The next time things may be a bit chaotic, when there are toys in every crevice of the home, take a step back and wonder what little mind created that mess? What were they doing? Was it worth stopping? It may be worth the pick up later!