The other morning, I had hit my point and needed a nap. I needed to close my eyes for just a few minutes, and give my body a break. I allowed Mazy to do about everything I told myself I WOULDN’T allow as a parent before I had a child, but oh, the things I have learned!
I told Mazy mommy needs to go sleep. She right away asked (knowing she could take advantage of the moment)…”Can I watch a show on the iPad and eat a snack, in bed?” Yes, sweetie, you may.
So I grabbed her animal crackers, she grabbed the iPad, we found a show, she tucked me in, and I fell asleep. While she laid next to me. During that 15 minute snooze, about 3 times, I could feel this gentle hand rub my arm. It was as if she was saying, “Mommy, it’s going to be okay. I’m here…”
I woke up each time, but etched these tender moments into my mind. This little girl, too young to understand the whole of Mommy’s healing process, but knew that by gentling rubbing my arm, God used that little hand to remind me that it’s okay. It’s all going to be okay.
It was completely harmless, really (even though eating in bed broke all the rules), but it didn’t matter. We were getting through the moment.
Do you find yourself in the same place sometimes? Maybe everyday! It was one of those moments that I had that “Mom guilt” enter in, thinking this so goes against what I would “normally” allow. But as that gentle touch was felt, it took away all that guilt.
And isn’t that the same for our faith in God? And His forgiveness? Sometimes I think, how could I screw up yet AGAIN? Guilt seeps in, and sometimes stays for awhile. But when I allow to just rest in Him, allow that gentle hand to touch my arm, and remind me that it’s going to be okay, it makes that guilt wash away.
Take time to accept that gentle touch. Recognize it for what it is. He cares, He’s always there, and will never leave our side.
A moment I almost missed because of mom guilt.