How I Got My Child To Sleep Through The Night

Well, I haven’t. Not consistently.

And I’m okay with it.

If you are looking for a checklist of how to get your child to sleep through the night, you are going to have to look elsewhere. This post is for all those moms out there who doubt their mothering, who doubt whether their baby ever will, and who think they are the only ones.

I read the books. I actually enjoyed reading Baby Wise (gave some great parenting tips). The thing is, after the first few weeks, I had to toss that book out the window. Thanks to my husband. It didn’t take long for us to realize (well, didn’t take Dan long) that Mazy wasn’t that child. She didn’t fit the mold of “that child”. She never has. I remember someone told me oh you HAVE to do Baby Wise because it is the only way to get your child to sleep. Then I felt the pressure. I felt the pressure to have my child sleeping through the night by 12 weeks.

Well, I am now 12 MONTHS later and Mazy still doesn’t consistently sleep through the night.

And like I said, I am okay with it. It’s life. I don’t know any different. And I want all those moms out there who are in the same boat, who have tried everything, to know that it’s okay. I used to worry that I was doing something wrong. That I was raising Mazy wrong. But my friends, those are lies.

Some kids are good sleepers, some are not. Now THAT’S a fact. It is NOT fact that every kid but yours sleeps through the night by 12 weeks. It’s NOT fact that once they do, they never wake up again in the middle of the night. Don’t believe the lies. I believed them for too long.

You are a good mother. You really are.

I have read those words “how I got my child to sleep” umpteen times in magazines, on pinterest, and also on other blogs. Each time I read that title, I thought “what am I doing wrong?”

I am learning that with everything in parenting, there is no “magical” list of how-tos. What works for one parent will not work for another. What I love about those closest to me is that they offer up what worked for them, but often say, “well this is what worked for me, not sure if it will for you.” THAT, is relatable parenting and love.

Just the other night, Mazy woke up and I let her cry for a bit (and realized it wasn’t going anywhere), so I cuddled her up and she was back asleep within minutes. I could’ve put her down sooner, but I didn’t want to. Call me an obsessed parent, but I just sat there and soaked it in. No, I don’t do that every night, but if it’s going to happen, I am going to make the most of it.

(Again, but don’t let me fool you – there are nights when I say “ugh, again?” Every night is not this soaking in, trust me. I need sleep too :)).

Mazy usually wakes up about 3-4 times a night, with the majority of them, she can put herself back to sleep. But there might be that 1 time she can’t. I even asked my doctor about it and she said some kids just wake up. And THAT IS NORMAL. If you have heard Mazy cry at night (and my family knows), she gets MAD, and there is no turning back! Really, it’s kind of funny (at times). Can’t wait to tell Mazy about it when she gets older! We did do the sleep training thing, and I still let her “cry it out” most times, but sometimes there are just those times where she just can’t find sleep back. I suppose I have that same problem too at times and could cry about it as well!

So don’t believe the lies. Don’t think everyone else’s kid is sleeping through the night. They aren’t. I jokingly say with my friends who have kids around the same age that we all need to be neighbors so that we can see that little light come on (if needed) and realize we are not alone.

We aren’t. We are all in this together. God has given us these precious children to love and nurture.

What a gift.

I often say that Mazy will hopefully be sleeping through the night by 18, so yes, there is light at the end of the tunnel. She has not gone more than 3 nights in a row sleeping through the night, and I can truly say, it’s okay. She will figure it out. Just like when I thought she would never eat solid foods, well, she does. Just like when I thought she would never give up that middle of the night feeding, well she did. Just like when I thought she wouldn’t give up her bottles, well, she did.

On her own time.

There is a reason why there are 100s of books out there telling you how to get your child to sleep through the night. Because there isn’t one right way.

But I do know one book that is always right – one book that calms all my doubts and fears as a parent. Just read Psalm 139 and you will realize that God chose YOU for this very moment. To cuddle that little baby in your arms, even if it’s in the middle of the night.

He chose YOU, before the beginning of time.

And that, my friends, is the reason I will not give a checklist on how to get your child to sleep through the night.