Loving Beyond
It’s the subject that gets brought up often, but a question that doesn’t always come up.
Will we have more kids?
It’s a subject that I LOVE to talk about, but I think people fear to ask the question. How many kids do we plan on having? Will we adopt? Will Mazy have a brother or sister someday?
Before having Mazy, to be completely honest, kids was a difficult subject. I did not always have the words to explain our situation because I did not fully understand it myself. But I have to say, now I am in a much better place because God’s plans make a whole lot more sense now!
Like I’ve said before, we never saw ourselves having an only child. But you have to remember that we never saw ourselves HAVING a child in the first place! So until you remember that later part of that, it makes having one a whole lot more understandable. We could try for another and things could go just fine. Or things could go worse and I could go through heart failure again, with the risk of never coming out of it. That scares all of us, including our families.
So we are incredibly content to LOVE our sweet Mazy! And that is the subject I want to hit on: loving beyond bounds.
I always thought that I had to have multiple kids to fulfill the love I wanted to give. To feel fulfilled. But that is not the story God has given Dan and I. Our love for children has maybe looked a little different. For some, God has called them to love the very children in their home – and to raise biological children to further His Kingdom. I see the beauty of families coming together to serve the One who made ALL things beautiful, in HIS time. Then there are others who God called to serve His Kingdom through adoption. Then there are others who God has called to serve His Kingdom just husband and wife. Then there are others who God has called to serve in His Kingdom, as a single man or woman of God. All scenarios that God can use – no scenario less than the other.
Dan and I have been given the privilege of being in youth ministry. We now not only get the gift of loving our very own child, but also to love the kids God has put in our life through ministry. I sometimes thought after having Mazy, that I needed another child to fill my love bucket up. But God has slowly been working on my heart knowing that my love does not end with children, but can overflow to the very children God has placed in our life through ministry. A simple concept, but one that took me time to learn and now knowing where God has us, I could not be more content.
Before we had Mazy, we always said we loved our youth group kids as our own. They truly were our children. We loved opening up our home to them, whether it be for a meal, a place to just talk, or even a place to lay their head for the night (or longer if needed). With Mazy being pretty young yet (and just figuring out this whole sleeping thing), some of those things haven’t come as easily now, but as we watch her grow, we realize Mazy has more brothers and sisters than we could ever ask for! More than I could ever give birth to for that matter! We have the best of BOTH worlds!
To see our youth group kids love her, teach her things, and to watch her look up to them, our hearts could not be more full. That child eats more cheetos off their plates, gives more “knucks” and high-fives, shows her belly rolling skills off, and shares more smiles with them! It brings tears to my eyes to see that our family doesn’t just consist of the 3 people in the picture on our wall. Our family goes far beyond that. Our family extends to our greater “God” family.
Whatever scenario God has you in, God can and still will work through you. I can PROMISE you that, for those who are in Christ Jesus. Our love doesn’t have to just stop with our children. It can go far beyond the bounds of our little family!
