Practicing Presence

The Meijer pop can line always strikes up a bit of angst for me. A few days ago, Mazy and I were steps away from the door when I saw a FAMILY pushing carts full of cans through the doorway and thought, yikaroos, it’s going to take forever to return these suckers! We walk up to the man-made line, as about 4 people were ahead of us. We kindly stepped to the side so that others leaving the store didn’t have to drive their over-filled carts around us waiters. A cart to the back of the heal, it’s like stepping on legos.
I could tell some people were growing impatient, but then we saw Dave.
Dave is what I like to call the pop can manager at Meijer. He is quick to empty the full bins, clean the dispensers, and ensure every spot of the floor is cleaned. And he’s not afraid to tell you about it either! I could sense his growing frustration as the people kept coming, meaning we were walking on his freshly mopped floor.
I get you, buddy! I could see the dirt spill off people’s shoes, onto the freshly wet floor, and he swiped his mop behind every footstep that was made. He finally vocalized his frustration, and I gently told him, “But you’re doing a fantastic job!” That opened up a whole conversation about his job that day, the good, the bad, and the ugly. He was going to be done at 3:30 because he worked 1st shift (he ensured I knew what each shift entailed), and he had only a few hours left. But in those 5-7 minutes that we were waiting, we learned a lot about Dave and the passion he has for his job.
You see, Dave has Down’s syndrome. He is the BEST at that job and every time I see him there, I know that it will be running as smoothly as a pop can return can. The dispensers will be working if he has the power to make them to, and they will be squeaky clean. He has an immense gift and he needed to know that what he was doing was making a difference and doesn’t go unnoticed. I’m not sure what we’d do without Dave at Meijer. Well, I know my pop can line would take a lot longer, it would be sticky and dirty, and he wouldn’t have taught me the gift of presence.
It’s easy for me to pull out my phone anytime I’m waiting in line for something. Granted Mazy was with me that time and having her with me, always makes me think twice about doing so. Isn’t it easy though, to forget what is right before us? Right in front of us? Right around us?
I would love to sit here and say that this is something we do all the time. Nope, this is just something I’m learning. We were made for relationship and yet we can’t “relationship” without trying to relate to someone. Practicing “withness” is something I feel Jesus has called us to do. Maybe we think we are “with” someone by scrolling through their social media profile, but as much as we want to think so, we aren’t. Taking time to show a genuine interest in someone’s life, someone right in front of us, is even better.
So how do we do this? Ask someone how their day is going. Compliment them on something they are wearing. Ask them what the highlight of their day has been so far. And there is always the simple comment about the weather to get the conversation going. We joke about it, but it works, doesn’t it? Or just simply smile – that tells someone they matter. You don’t even have to say a word. Remember, you’re not requiring them to become your best friend.
You’re just trying to be a friend by practicing presence.