Delight In The Lord

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart – Psalm 37:4

This verse has been raining down on my heart the past few months and especially in the past few weeks. I may have talked about this already, but I want to share again, how God’s timing is perfect. Every piece of it. Down to the day. And the hour.

The week of May 12, we always have many emotions. We celebrate the 8 years of love that God has blessed Dan and I with. Yet it is also a reminder of the 8 years of just us two, with no children. A desire of our hearts. It is also the week of when our babies were supposed to be due. So many emotions. On Wednesday, May 14, Dan decided to do a youth group lesson this very verse:

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart – Psalm 37:4

The first part of this verse is essential. You see, without applying the first, the second isn’t a guarantee. I never fully understood this verse because I didn’t trust that this verse was true. And it’s not just because I am now pregnant. You see, that day that Dan gave the message in youth group about this verse, it was before we knew what miracles God was going to do in our life. We had no clue.

When we went to Islamorada in April, we really wrestled with our life’s situation, yet by the end, concluded that no, we are to delight ourselves in the Lord, and bask in HIS glory, not our circumstances. From that week forward, we just wanted what GOD wanted. And that is why Dan felt led to share this verse.

He stood up there telling the kids, that even though he desired his own children, that maybe it wasn’t God’s plan. And that He was okay with it. He wanted what God wanted. He was willing to give up that dream, to delight himself in the Lord first. The amount of peace that came out of him sharing that, gave us a pep in our step for the next day.

The day of my yearly heart appointment.

And as we walked into that office, God knew that day, He knew before the beginning of time, that He would give us the desire of our hearts.

God needed to do a spiritual heart change in us first. We had to delight ourselves FULLY in God’s plan for our lives. Giving up dreams because we wanted GOD’S dreams. And we have an incredibly long ways to go, trust me. But I wasn’t willing before to fully delight myself in the Lord because I was disagreeing with the journey He had taken us down. I had to give it up. I had to give it over to HIM.

It wasn’t a mistake that Dan did the message he did that Wednesday night. It was all part of God’s perfect plan. He could have done that message ANY Wednesday, but his heart felt it was to be that night. It was that night, that God gave us a peace that passes all understanding.

That night as we laid in bed, falling asleep, I had a fleeting thought that what if, just what IF, God healed my heart, and we were able to have our own kids.

And lo and behold, God blessed us with the gift of healing.

And God blessed us with the gift of a child.

A child within.

A child within. Me.

Pregnancy Update: I have been feeling so GREAT. I can’t even begin to tell you how overjoyed we still are about this all. Not a day goes by without rejoicing. We have savored every moment thus far because we know everyday, this is a dream come true. My baby belly is growing like CRAZY, to the point that I can no longer where my pants “normal” which means fully zipped and buttoned. The belly-band is a life-saver, long tanks are so comfortable, and watching this belly grow, brings such immense joy in our lives. I LOVE wearing maternity clothes! I believe on Wednesday that I felt the first movement of our baby! I was at work, was walking down the hallway to the bathroom, and felt this flutter. It took me a millisecond to realize what was going on, but I am almost sure it was the baby! I don’t even remember if I went to the bathroom, but all I know is that I quickly emailed Dan to tell him! I am over 15 weeks along, able to still exercise fully, I sleep well at night, and I have cravings that just taste oh so good! Spaghettios never tasted so good, cereal I can’t get enough of, and ice cream? Ya can’t go wrong. Daily we are thankful for this blessing. For this growth. For this miracle. Oh to meet this child someday, we can’t WAIT!