How Personal Guilt Can Cause Clutter

This week I have been talking about the various ways clutter can enter our lives. Some causes of clutter are seen tangibly in our everyday lives, while some causes are hidden deep within, like our insecurities.

Do you ever feel guilty? Do you ever have those guilty feelings that cause you to hold on to things, that really have no use being in your home? Do you hold onto past hurts, situations, or experiences, that now mask themselves through the clutter in your home?

Even though this may be a new idea, guilt is a large reason why clutter happens. You may not think that guilt has a grip on you, but let me share with you 3 examples of how guilt can overtake your life and end up overtaking your home with clutter.

1. NISS. I am coining a new syndrome and it is known as the Need-It-Someday Syndrome (NISS). Take a moment to walk around your home. Open up your cupboards. Crouch down and look in the back of your shelves. How many items are you keeping because you think you may need it someday?

This habit causes guilt. If you get rid of it, you are going to feel guilty if you need it someday, so you hang onto it. For example, lets take something as simple as food storage containers. Most homes have WAY too many; lets be frank. Why? We hang onto them, thinking we will need them someday and if we get rid of them, guilt will set in if they ARE needed. Make sense? If you are out of containers and someone needs one, you feel guilty you gave them up. What you may not realize though, is that there are other solutions. Really though, how often does that happen? How often does the someday actually HAPPEN? Rarely.

2. Regret. Regret is a form of guilt. You regret and end up feeling guilty about the money you spent on an item. Why is this one so painful? Because it forces you to admit that you maybe didn’t make the right choice in the first place. Then guilt sets in. Do you have a sweater that you bought, but realized after wearing it 2 times, that you don’t really like it? Or maybe it doesn’t fit you? You spent a pretty penny on it, so you don’t want to get rid of it, but in reality, you will never wear it again? How many other items in your home does this apply to? Your regret will eventually subside if you actually get RID of the item because it won’t be staring you in the face. If you hang onto it, every time you see it, it just reminds you of the price you paid, how you don’t like it anymore, and how it doesn’t fit you. Get rid of the guilt and get rid of the items in your home that cause regret.

3. Keepsakes. This is a hard subject to talk about because it makes one think about all those they have lost in their life. I do not want to downplay the need to grieve and deal with the losses in life. My husband and I have lost two precious children through a miscarriage and we have nothing tangible to remember them. Therefore, we have something our nephew gave us, that has helped us remember them (a keepsake). The thing is, when it comes to losing a parent or grandparent, often children are left to deal with all of the stuff left behind. As my husband says “you can’t tow a uhaul behind a hearse”. It is easy to keep every little thing that reminds us of that person. In reality though, we have to keep in mind that the stuff is NOT the person. Keeping everything they owned, only adds clutter to your own home. Remember too, that person isn’t going to know what you kept and didn’t keep. Don’t hold onto something for fear of what they may think if you got rid of something, which ultimately is guilt. What they value may be different from what you value. Keep only what brings positive memories to mind and that enhances your home – not clutters it.

Guilt masks itself in many ways – especially through NISS, regret, and keepsakes. Think about how guilt effects the clutter in your home. Hopefully these ideas help you reflect on what you are keeping, maybe for the wrong reasons. Don’t let guilt control your life!