Update
Ah…
What a great weekend we both had! Dan went on his annual fishing trip with the Van Lente’s (always a highlight of the year) and I went scrapbooking with my sisters. We both left on Thursday and came back today – it was a much needed getaway! After realizing how refreshing our weekend was, we realized how much more we need to getaway just us two. Not maybe the first thing one would think of after losing a job – going on a vacation – but we know the right opportunity will come up. There are cheap ways to get away – this weekend was a definite reflection of that! God continually provides in ways we never expect and it is just so comforting to know God is watching everything that is happening. God continues to give us people to surprise us (in a good way), shock us (in a good way), and love on us. It continues to bring me to tears! I have yet to have a good cry over all that is going on – more tears have come from the utter joy that others have brought – so good tears! How cool is that? (side note: sometimes I really dislike the word “cool” but I have a brain fart and can’t think of a better word).
So where are we at? Good question. I feel Dan and I have so much to catch up on as it seems our life is moving so quickly, yet so slow. So many little things are happening that we will be having one conversation and mid-conversation we’ll say “wait…I need to tell you another thing later” and then continue in our current conversation. It’s just hard to tell each other everything that is going on. You’d think our life would be so slow right now – it is, but it’s just such a different busy. So much is happening everyday it seems that it’s hard to keep up on it all. Tonight Dan and I have sat on our couch catching up on emails and just talking, talking, talking. Not that I ever have a problem NOT talking, but there is just so much to catch up on.
We feel we still have so many questions, but really could be summed up into one – why? Somebody who I recently have had such wonderful conversations with, sent me this today that said: “Try not to ask the silly question, “God, what are You doing?” because the answer is always the same: “I’m changing you!” In our hearts we know that is exactly what God is doing. But like this person said, there will be gaps that need to be filled. We are feeling those gaps. We are having a hard time putting together all the pieces of the puzzle – but the problem is, we feel we don’t have all the pieces. But God does. God has all the pieces that will put together a beautiful puzzle someday called “OUR LIFE.” We continue to pray that at the end of it all, God will say “well done, good and faithful servant.” We have a long ways to go, but we know if we keep seeking Him, we can accomplish this. Isn’t this the goal of every Christian?
We still feel we are walking the road of uncertainty, but like Brenda said to me today, a little fear and uncertainty can be healthy b/c it makes us fully rely on God. I think it’s true that when things are going smooth in life, it’s hard to feel the “need” for God. In our life right now, we have this love relationship with God that we have never experienced before – there is just this level of trust that we can’t explain. By saying that, do I mean that we have no fear? No. But deep down we know God is driving the Sterk-mobile somewhere. We just have to realize God is taking us mile by mile and we just have to look out the window and see where God is taking us and just take it all in. And to speak up and act when God asks us to do something. Hopefully this week we will navigate the house-selling process. Not something we are real eager about, but we know that is part of the road God is taking us down. It is a huge leap of faith for us because in selling a house (if that is for sure what we are going to do) it’s something that is totally out of our hands. We can prepare our house as much as we can, but God will have to take care of the rest and we know He will.
AND…this week Tuesday is Brenda’s ULTRASOUND! We are so excited about it! Excited yet anxious in a way too. This is the 3rd hurdle that the docs said we need to get through – really the final (even though we have like 8 months to go). We are so hoping we’ll be able to hear those hearts beat! They may be too young, and if that’s the case, hopefully we’ll be able to SEE how many. Our heart’s desire is that there are two. We know they are in God’s hands and if there is only one, there will be some disappointment there, but we know whatever the case is, it’s God’s will. And if neither survived, we know that is God’s will for our life.
So thankful for a great weekend and we are eager to see what God has in store for us this week!