How Can You Not See God?
That song (see blog post title) by Leanna Crawford rang through the speakers in our van on the way to school yesterday morning. After I asked my daily question to Mazy, “How did God paint the sky”, this song came on as both of our voices joined together. I’ve listened to that song 100 times, but it hit differently this time around.
Yesterday I felt like a girl who wasn’t just fighting leukemia and heart failure, but someone who God has given a life outside of those two things to as well. It was filled with deep conversations, attending youth group kids’ spring sporting events (yay for being outside!), and I told Dan on the way home, I felt normal today for the first time in MONTHS. I was doing what “normal” people do.
And then to top it off, as if God was saying, how can you NOT see me? Today Mazy is Alex Morgan, the famous US soccer player for her wax museum project at school. She’s been working on this project for months with her classmates, and today is the big reveal.
We normally do not have cable, but we signed up for a trial of YouTube TV during Michigan football’s run at the national championship so we could watch the games, and also for March madness. I cancelled the membership bc the trial was up, but we still had access last night. We turned on the TV, and wouldn’t you know it, the US women’s soccer team was playing Canada in the She Believes Cup. In the middle of the week. We’ve never watched women’s soccer before and it just so happened to be on the night before Mazy represented her favorite soccer player! I just sat in awe as Mazy watched diligently, Alex’s every move. The smile on her face and the awe she watched with, made me think, how could we not see God in that moment? I finally said to her, sweet girl, this is not a coincidence, this is all God.
And this is how I have to remember how God orders my life too. It has felt like chaos with no direction or understanding. Coming off a week that I’d rather soon forget, God ordered Tuesday as a reminder that we are going to be okay because He has it all under control. Circumstances are still difficult, but God reminded me of who is in control of it all.
As you can see by the picture, I’m reading the book “Suffering is Never For Nothing” by Elisabeth Elliot. This too, has been no mistake! A hard read as I process what God has brought us through, but it also opens my eyes to his faithfulness and to his faithfulness is Elisabeth’s life. May we all rest in the knowledge that even though our minds can’t make sense of it all, God’s mind is so much better than ours and He truly does, have it all under control. Even down to the timing of a soccer game.
This reminds me of a picture that my sister used to hang on her wall. It had the story of a person who has had it rough in life. When he went to heaven, he was strolling the streets of glory with God when he looked down and saw his footsteps in life’s journey. What shocked him was the fact that there were a pair of footsteps on the ground when the going was good, but only one pair when it was rough. So he asked God why He’d forsake him in time of need. God gave him the most surprising answer: “That single pair of footsteps you see on the ground are mine, carrying you in times of hardship, son.” This is what He says in Isaiah 46:4 Christian Standard Bible
I will be the same until your old age, and I will bear you up when you turn gray. I have made you, and I will carry you; I will bear and rescue you.
AMEN!!
So beautifully said, Kristin! We often see God every day but don’t really stop to praise Him or say thank you. Mazy is getting so many lessons on God-sightings to share with her friends, too. Hope her project went well. Thank you for sharing your heart and your walk.
Thank you for your kind and encouraging words!
This is amazing, I love love love the moments where it is just so obvious that He is working, and that He sees us individually. What a blessing!