The Tale of Two Restaurant Experiences

My husband recently turned 45 and even though he was gone fishing for his birthday, the next day we celebrated as a family by going to our favorite restaurant, Vitales. The Michigan football game was a 3:30 start, so we thought it would be fun to watch part of the game at the high-top tables, eating our pizza, at the restaurant. TV screens hung from every angle of the room, and thankfully each way our eyes turned, we could see the game. And in the 3 minutes it took to leave our house, drive to the restaurant, and be seated, Michigan went from losing by 7 to ahead by 3. Whew.

Meanwhile, the surrounding tables started to fill up. A husband and wife, and their daughter sat directly behind us. As their conversation started, both Dan and I heard them talking about Jesus and what He meant to them. A surprising conversation starter and one that perked our ears. So much so, that when they left, Dan was hoping they’d walk our way so that he could mention to him how refreshing it was to hear them talking about Jesus. They walked the other way and he didn’t get a chance, but needless to say, it encouraged our hearts.

Then towards the middle of the area, another family sat down, a husband and wife, with 2 daughters. I’m guessing one was near high school age, and the other around 6th grade. Immediately after they sat down, the mom and 2 daughters, pulled out their individual phones, while the dad held the menu. After about a minute or two, they all put their phones away and began looking at the menu. As soon as the waitress was done taking their order, the table grew quiet. Every person pulled out their phone, and that was the way they sat until their food came. No conversation. No eye contact. No engagement. No facial expressions. Just a family having dinner “together”.

I ended up speaking my thoughts out loud to my family, noticing that everyone was on their phones, and I couldn’t help but think of the contrast of the two tables behind and to the side of us. One talking about Jesus and what He meant to them and the other, no conversation; just eyes glued to their screens.

I could get into the debate about what age is appropriate to start cell phone use, how much is too much, what apps should be allowed, etc., but I think how those two situations were pegged against each other, says it all.

When we have a moment as a family, how do we choose to spend it? This was a challenge to me.

When we have a moment as a family, what are our conversations about? This was a challenge to me.

When we have a moment as a family, what is our first priority? This was a challenge to me.

Are our phones and what we are “looking up”, more important than the people in front of us? Are our phones the first priority? That is what we are signaling. Are the conversations we facilitate honoring to God, or are they only feeding into worldly perspectives?

Phones have wonderful uses. Though, we sometimes think we can use our phones and build relationships at the same time – that’s called multi-tasking, right? But are relationships meant to be multi-tasked?

How are we spending the sacred times with our families, when those sacred times are so few and far between? What do we need to set aside, put down, or let rest, so that we can invest in the people right in front of us?

I leave this post as is. Let it sink in. It has sunk in for our family…Mazy doesn’t have a phone, but it does make us wonder…what lifestyle and culture are we portraying to her?

It was a simple restaurant experience, to celebrate Dan’s birthday. But it ended up being MUCH more than that. A contrast of two perspectives that we couldn’t help but think, what do we long to portray?

Some food for thought…